Abdullah’s Final Fence Falter

Painfully Penned By Barry Montgomery 2009-11-03

A Twist Worthy of Eastenders!

What with all the allegations and accusations hanging over his head since the beginning of Afghanistan’s second ‘democratic’ election, few would have thought that Hamid Karzai would see the campaign through and even fewer thought that he could actually come out victorious.

But, just like the sneaky underdog that was Milhous Nixon in ’72, Karzai has been declared the ‘legitimate leader’ of Afghanistan after the second round vote was cancelled by the Independent Election Commission (a board of officials he himself had appointed) ; leaving speechless millions of people the world over.

Afghanistan has spent the last two months in the murky waters of political limbo after the first vote was hindered with allegations of ballot rigging and widespread intimidation, which resulted in an international outcry for a run off between the two candidates, due to be held this Saturday (7th Nov).

But the electoral watchdog has announced that there would be no need for the planned run off election between Karzai and challenger Abdullah Abdullah, as Dr Abdullah pulled out of the race stating that it ‘would be impossible to hold a fair poll in the face of state fraud’.

Did I Hear You Right?!

Karzai, who over the recent months has faced accusations of fraud and voting rigging, was on Monday (2nd Nov) being congratulated by American officials on winning his second term in office. But the compliments were somewhat hollow considering their earlier complaints about the corruption surrounding Karzai’s administration.

After the announcement, London and Washington officials called upon Karzai to address the corruption that he allowed to plague the country under his watch since he was last elected. The same officials made clear to Karzai also that he also has to reinstated his former Foreign Minister Abdullah Abdullah to a new role in his new government

Less than 24 hours after Dr Abdullah stood down from the race, the electoral watchdog announced that the vote had been cancelled to ‘prevent insecurity and instability’ continuing on to announced Karzai as the new president.

After the statement, Zekria Barakzai, the deputy chief electoral officer was heard asking the press ‘why should people sacrifice their lives for an election when the result is already known?’

After all that fuss about having a democratic and fairly run election, Karzai and his unquenchable lust for power that he often allows to over-rule his personal beliefs, is now Afghanistan’s President for the next five years… for better or worse….

Brand New – Daisy (2009)

Painfully Penned by Barry Montgomery 2009-10-30

OVERNIGHT SUCCESS STORIES

Jesse Lacey is a 31-year-old middle-class Long Island native. He also is the front man with Long Island alternate rock band Brand New; which in turn, makes him an idol in the eyes of thousands of teenage ‘emos’ worldwide. A three letter word that can destroy a band before they even begin, cast off as nothing more than musical dribble not worth giving the chance.

Ignoring the labelling and tags, Brand New have, over their last eight years, with each and every offering, strived to push the boundaries of their musical abilities, making them like none other.

Debut ‘Your Favourite Weapon” (2002) on indie label Triple Crown made an over-night success of the band, becoming the creators of the generation that is now known as the cash cow genre of emo.

In this false and image-conscious scene fuelled by fickle fans and scenesters, the Long Island natives knew they had to create something even more special with album number two. And after nearly two years of label turmoil (which we won’t get into here), second album ‘Deja Entendu’ (2004) was quickly recorded and released on Dreamworks.

Hitting the shelves with a resounding thud, their sophomore effort gained the approval of an entire generation of confused and frustrated middle-class kids, defining Brand New as ones to watch.  Exploding the band into the dirty murky waters of fame, where many would and have cracked under the strain, the band took the toils of touring, deaths of family members and the pressures of being idols and turned their tales into album number three; ‘The Devil and God Are Raging Inside Me’(2006).

With tracks injected with heavy doses of melancholy and despair, some fans couldn’t take their boldness and creativity and jumped ships while the rest hung in there and believed in their band and they grew, musically, alongside their heroes. But enough of this history lesson…

ALBUM REVIEW

Jesse and co. approach each new album with the idea of forming something original and progressively more twisted than its predecessors. And after a three year wait, 2009 saw the release of album four, ‘Daisy’, and the latest offer of how far Brand New are willing to push their musical ability.

Opener ‘Vices’ begins with the sounds of softly sung, angelic, piano-led hymn, lulling the listener into a false sense of security, which is quickly replaced by confusion as the full assault of Brand New is unleashed, unsuspecting to its listeners.

Similar in parts to ‘TD&GARIM’, Lacey still sings of solitude and sexuality, and still questions spirituality, with his lyrics painting pictures of pain and angst, swallowed by the song, he becomes the torture soul within his lyrics.

But as the album opens up to the listeners, tracks lead us off the path of their previous efforts and we wander hand-in-hand into the world of a post-rock Brand New. ‘In A Jar’ and ‘Gasoline’ are clear examples of the new music direction Brand New have taken, while Lacey’s lyrics remain filled with melancholy and despair.

‘You Stole’ is a straight up salute back to their heydays of ‘I Believe You, But My Tommy Gun Don’t’ with Jesse’s softly spoken vocals lying warm over a muted guitar riff, with a occasional fills of Mogwai-esque guitar playing filtering through.

Layering three guitars on tracks fills out the sound, with the low end of the bass being used heavily on most tracks; their latest offering is worlds apart from their early pop punk days. ‘Gasoline’ and ‘Be Gone’ are songs that would make the final cut for any of Modest Mouse’s LP, while title track ‘Daisy’ could stand proudly along side with any offering of Scottish post rockers Mogwai.

Lead single from the album ‘At the Bottom’ sees Lacey’s vocals stretched to their limits as he screams his inner demons out and into our speakers.

Overall this will probably be a grower to their current fans, but a definitely hit for the post-rock scene kids.

While Jesse’s claims to his legion of listeners that “I’ve created nothing” in track ‘In A Jar’, both he and us know his statement couldn’t be further from the truth.

The Twisted Pepper Café Launch & Absolut Art Exhibition

Words By Barrry Montgomery 2009-10-09

A New Solution

Sick of Starbuck?  Munchies pissing ya off?  Well then Bodytonic have a solution for you!

Coming up on the Twisted Pepper’s first birthday, the boys at Bodytonic have fought through the doom and gloom of the recession and are launching The Twisted Pepper Café.  From Monday 12^th October, the Café will be open 7 days a week from 4pm with quality teas, coffees and nibbles on offer.

“Is that all?” I hear ya whinging… no actually it’s not!  There’s also an Absolut Cocktail bar, non-stop drinks specials, a jukebox and a round pool table.  Bet you wouldn’t get any of that in any of your south side cafés!

Drink away your recession blues/dole money and celebrate the launch in the Twisted Pepper this Saturday (10^th Oct) from 8pm onwards.

To mark the launch Bodytonic have team up Absolut Art who will being holding an Exhibition on the night.  While gazing at the pictures, down the endless supply of cocktails, test out their new drinks specials and drunkenly enter the round pool table contest.  Who knows you might even get lucky!

Club night Pogo continues the feel good fun from 11pm with Donal Dineen starting his monthly POGO residency in the Stage room.

The Café

The café will play host to monthly art exhibitions, all primarily related to the world of music.  Each gallery will be launched on the first Saturday of the month.  Check Bodytonic’s site for more info on the full exhibit plan.

Also Comedy Ireland will be in the Mezz area with a selection of top local comics and U:Mack have New York’s fantastic Obits band in the Stage.

So cool, they should charge, an added bonus it that it’s always free into the Cafe Sundays – Wednesdays and until 11pm on Thursdays -Saturdays when the club nights start.

The Twisted Pepper

Since its conception almost a year ago, the layout of the Twisted Pepper is unlike other venues found in the greater Dublin area.  The uber-cool venue is split into 4 main areas for live gigs, club nights, AV & multimedia events, art exhibitions, talks, plays, themed events & reservations/parties:

The Stage has a 350 capacity for AV, live or DJ performances.                       

The Basement has a 250 capacity club space with one of the most spec’d out DJ booths found in the city.                                                                                

The Café’s space for chatting, drinking, coffee, art exhibitions can also be used for and DJ performances.

And not to be confused with the sweatbox across the Liffey, Twisted Pepper’s Mezz area has a 60-80 capacity that overlooks the Stage room, also featuring shutters enabling it to become its own private room, featuring  a giant plasma screen, bar and again spec’d with sound and light for DJs & live acts.
For upcoming events in café check out www.bodytonicmusic.com/events

Men are Redundant (A Future of Lonely Nights with Sex Scenes on a Muted TV?)

Painfully Penned By Barry Montgomery 2009-10-01

Note: I feel I should mention that this article that was an assignment to be written to be in support of the statement “Men Are Redundant”.   I personally believe that men are  NOT becoming redundant, as it against the law for scientists to create a human embryo, and so the chances of human sperm being used for fertilisation of human eggs and the implantation of embryos in the near future is extremely low, so sorry girls, but us men are here to stay.

The Beginning of a Whole Different Ball Game

1996 was the year crew-cut, hairy-legged feminists worldwide rejoiced; science was on the road to eradicating the one obstacle in their way to ruling the earth; man.  And their reason for rejoicing?  1996 was also the year of Dolly the sheep,
now a household name, but back then in the ‘90s, an unimaginable step forward in biological science.  Back then we’d already heard all about sperm banks and of all types of fertility treatments, but this was the beginning of a whole different ballgame.

Irish Love Letters to the EU

Painfully Penned By Barry Montgomery 2009-09-30

The Europe Social Funding Scheme (ESF) was set up in ’57 to help educate and prevent the dreaded thoughts of high unemployment figures in the newly formed ECC.  And those little green application forms for ESF grants, our own little love letters to the EU, are slips of paper  Irish Government Officials are well used to filling out; mouths salivating at the thoughts of more ‘free money’.

Over the past thirty-odd years of our relationship with the European Union, we, like spoiled children, have been dragged kicking and screaming into modern times and since ’73, we’ve received €6 billion in educational funding alone; still we bitch and moan.

ESF Handouts
Annually, Ireland receives €22 billion from the EU; over the years amounting to a grand auld figure of €60 billion, give or take a few pennies.  From motorways to milk quotas, EU funding has gone into almost every aspect of Irish life.

Some of those sacks of cash received from ESF have enabled the Irish educational system to provide more places on a wider range of courses, no fees, and even grant assistance for students who otherwise wouldn’t be able to gain further education.

Of course, we Irish pat each other on the back, congratulating each other on building a great educational system, while the truth being; Ireland hasn’t stood on its own two feet since the Stone Age; left to us, the priests would still be head honchos.

Dirty Politics in the Far Flung Middle East

Written Under Duress by Barry Montgomery 08-09-09

Nixon’s campaign fed off civil unrest in the ‘70s.  Good Old Bush Jr. tapped into the fears of a post 9/11 America to gain a second term, while Obama’s making promises he seemingly can’t keep.

And it’s apparently Nixon and Bush’s ‘dirty politics handbook’ that ‘US-ally’ Afghan President Hamid Karzai is playing from for his re-election campaign in this year’s Afghanistan general elections, due to be held this August.

Fearing being forced into a run off election in October with opponent, and former Foreign Minister, Abdullah Abdullah, Karzai has done everything he can in an attempt to solicit votes from Afghans.

From the discovery of Karzai’s brother’s attempts to buy up voter registration cards in order to rig Augusts’ elections to announcing a former warlord, Mohammad Qasim Fahim, as his running mate; it is clear Abdullah Abdullah’s presence as the slow rising underdog is causing the President many a sleepless night.
It is this threat of losing his beloved position that has driven Karzai to seek support for his party from the ethnic minority group, the afghan Shi’ite Muslims.

In a deliberate attempt to appeal to the male religious fundamentalists of the group, Karzai signed into law, The Shi’ite Personal Status Law in April 2009.

The Legislation, meant to govern family law for the minority Muslim Shi’ites has provoked outrage throughout the Western World.  The Taliban-esque law demands that a wife fulfils her husband’s sexual demands, disallows women from inheriting any of their husbands’ wealth when he dies and grants guardianship of children to husbands and grand fathers.

Closing St Loman’s?!…Are You Mental?!

Written Under Duress by Barry Montgomery May 2009

St Loman's Hospital

‘It is estimated that one in four of us will experience some mental health problems in our lifetime.’

So, roughly speaking that’s just over one million people in Ireland, and no doubt, you, a friend, or even I, has had a family member suffer from some form of a mental health problem.

Now you know the facts, some memories of a rumour might spring to mind: the closure of St. Loman’s Psychiatric Hospital anyone? ‘Ah yeah, but sure they’ve been saying that for years’. Well then, if you’ve been following the news coverage you probably already know this but… let me refresh your memory…

For years, rumours of the hospital’s impending closure have been quietly whispered, boldly spoken and, in countless rebuttals by the Health Service Executive/Hapless Shambolic Entity (HSE), viciously denied.

Ready for the Reform Treaty?

Written Under Duress by Barry Montgomery May 2009

“Join the EU? Loads of benefits? Deadly, sounds like a plan”…

So there we were, 1973… arses falling out of our trousers, hands constantly gripping either a pint or a bible when we decided to step up to play with the big boys.  At the mention of a bit of free cash, we jumped up - our ears perked up like a dog at the word ‘bone’ - signed the dotted line and we were away!

Soon enough, we were fixing something called our ‘infrastructure’ (and even using big words such as ‘infrastructure’), the piles on our arses disappearing as the roads got smoother, no more pot holes for us boys.

Anti-Lisbon Treaty Campaign Posters

Anyway, where was I?… A nation of drunks and wife-beaters finally getting an education, a health care system – shite, but a health care system none-the-less - and hand-outs for whatever we could claim for.

Before we knew it, 20 years had sailed by; with a little hiccup of the Treaty of Nice, when priests stopped abusing alter boys for a moment to cry out at the proposed legalisation of abortion, when we moaned with ‘Father Fiddle’ until we got our way as the bigwigs in Brussels grumbled incoherently bout ‘those bloody Irish’.

Then the Lisbon Treaty comes around and us paddies can’t make head or tails of what exactly it was all about, but it turns out it’s not our thick ignorant asses fault cause the boys in Brussels couldn’t understand it either… and they wrote it!

Leader of Libertas, Declan Ganley, who lead the anti-Lisbon Treaty campaign

This and the fact that opposing parties – rumoured to be funded by US billionaires - used scaremonger tactics about us losing our nationalism and our neutrality and so when it came to voting, it was soundly defeated.  Imagine, in a union of 430 million, it only took a nation of 3 million (with only half of us turning up to vote) to plunge the EU into a legal limbo.

It’s coming around again in October, and I’ll be voting yes, and if you have any cop-on, you will too.

‘The Aftermath’ Live @ The Greville Arms 2/May/09

Johnny & Co.

Two Words to descrisbe Irish mod rockers’ single launch for ‘Northern Lingerie’…. Fucking Class…

www.myspace.com/theaftermathband

New single available from download.ei and itunes

‘Ever27′ Live @ Danny Byrne’s 17/Apr/09

Ever27

So there I was wanting to quench my thirst in my regular spot Danny Byrnes, maybe have an auld glance at the one or two young wans (I’m on a strict ‘look-but-if-you-touch-your-balls-are-fucked’ basis), smoke the odd fag, nothing too hectic but when I approached the door, you can imagine my shock to find it close with two bouncers outside telling crowds that because of the gig tonight, it wouldn’t be open till half nine.

Rage! Guess I got to settle for the Stables, then I heard ‘Fred’ were playing down the back. So there I was stuck in the front bar, with all the auld lads, who between them all probably haven’t seen a piece of action is the last decade, and judging by the bellies on a few of them, haven’t seen their dicks in probably just as long.